Heaven Beside You
by Butterfly Wolf
Summary: Estel is my sickness. The flame that once drew me near to him has now become iced over, a blizzard of expectancy from superiors and Lore Lords. I can only hope now that the flame still resides inside of him, still, just a little spark that might warm me..
1. Chapter 1

Xx-Heaven Beside You-xX

A Lord of the Ring Fanfiction

By: Butterfly Wolf

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Everything is owned by J, R. R. Tolkien and his family. I make absolutely no money.

Authors Note: Please review and tell me if it should be continued!

I use a lot of Alice in Chain's song titles in this story, the song Heaven Beside You being my inspiration. I wont post the lyrics on here, but if you wanna get a little more in debt to sort of…hidden meanings, you should go glance through them :D! (Its suppose to be Legolas's point of view, so if you should listen to that song, think about the meaning of suffering for another and just watching them rise to their status).

Also, I have to say, the hardest part about making this story, is combining Tolkien's Legolas with Peter Jackson's Legolas. For Tolkien's is a rather playful, easy going, almost childlike innocent Legolas, very much unlike most elves. Peter Jackson's is rather serious, very much in the background, and mainly just a compassionate friend that tends to play Captain Obvious on some accounts. So please bare with me!

Intro:

xX~Nutshell~Xx

Estel.

That was what they called him. The royals of Imladris, they had taken him in as Elrond's adopted son. Of course, rumors spoke otherwise. It may be a sad thing that I knew of his heritage before he did. Alas, it cannot be changed.

The first time I had ever seen him, was on my first trip to Rivendell. My father, my high king, is not fond of the Peredhil, and had attempted to generally keep a great distance from him and his kingdom. He did well, for Mirkwood is well away from the dwelling of Elrond, but no matter how much they disliked each other, darkness continued to plague their kingdoms. A darkness that both me and Estel vanquished eventually, but this was long ego, long before the Fellowship, long before…before he had sworn himself to the Evenstar.

It is said that elves feel time less than any other kind. I don't believe that. Although I have been called strange for an elf, by many of my mortal and immortal companions, such as Frodo or Gandalf, I am still an elf. It was but years ago that Estel was free of a marriage bond, but it feels like ages. This was back when Yrch were beginning to regroup, and gain more. Back when The Ring of Power was out of sight and thought. Yrch's were just part of life, and no end seemed near.

A big part of life in Mirkwood. It was the biggest elven kingdom in Middle Earth…it was also the closest to Mordor, next to Lorien. And although Thranduil was not very fond of the Lorien elves, he still protected them as best he could. But Mirkwood faced two evils, constantly. Yrch and Spiders. Rivendell and Lorien, faced an occasional band of Yrch, Mirkwood, faced the band of Yrch that side-passed Gondor and went straight for the woods. It made every citizen of the Wood who wished to travel up from the caves, a decent warrior. It also made it so that if Thranduil would wish to send his one and only son without a party of guards to guide him to Imladris, he could. And he did.

Compared to the High Elves of Lorien and Rivendell, we of the Greenwood seem below them and barbaric. For my father does not dress me in gold and silver, I leave not my kingdom with armor or chain-mail like the Peredhil do. But we here, face the forefront of Mordor, and lack the technology and supply or armor that the Noldor have, and still manage to keep them from our kingdom. It was actually this issue that sent me to Rivendell. To discuss such things. Little did I know what I would meet there, my sorrow, and my happiness.

Estel is my eternal sickness. Elves cannot be sickened, but somehow he managed. Every time I think I'm better, in reality, I'm worse. At first, it was nothing like this. He was just carefree and young. It was only when they told him of his true heritage that everything went down hill, and that fire that had so drawn me to him suddenly became hidden. He was no longer Estel, Foster son of Elrond, but now Aragorn, son of Arathorn. Inside him, my fire still raged, but on the outside, on the surface, he was the fairy tale he was always destined to be. He was the Growing King, the Deciding Hero, everything everybody else wanted of him. Only when we were completely, was I ever allowed to see that flame that dwelled inside. Something that was excruciatingly difficult while on the Fellowship…that was the time when even he lost hope in his fire. I think he wished he still had it, but knew not the truth. And I guess we will never know, will we? Because now he weds the Evenstar, and now I am left in the background, once more. A passing memory of what was. Still, through all my suffering, for some reason, I see it better that it be me in all this pain, and not him. Therefore, I have done my best to keep up my apparence. Surrounding myself with The Twins, whom I originally wasn't that found of, or Gimili, who has forever helped me upon the subject of Aragorn. I will not part these lands until his passing, but it will kill me everyday. But if I cant be with him, as it once was. I suppose I'd feel better dead.

Chapter One:

xX~No Excuses~Xx

It seemed nothing I said bought me out of this one. The king had made his mind up, and suddenly, I found myself paying deeply for not ever attending my 'Princely Duties;', instead of 'frolicking around the wood and singing to the trees'.

It was a three day ride to Rivendell, but I made it in two with just myself. Father had sent a messenger about a week ago to warn them of my arrival. I wasn't very happy about journeying out of the Greenwood, for Father spoke of the differences of the High Elves. I had no want to be there, but once again, I was paying for constantly avoiding the council room.

"There hails Legolas!" Yelled a border guard as I entered the realm. He spoke it in common elvish, for that, I was thankful. For I knew little of these Noldor's language. Once again, avoiding princely duties caught up with me.

There was one thing I had interest in, here, in Rivendell. Word spoke, from Lorien, a place I had never been, that a mortal now dwelled in the House of Elrond. Son of Arathorn, I was told. At the time, it wasn't a scoring point for Imladris. From what my father said, not only were they stuck-up-High-Elves but they also harbored humans, how charming. A band of Dwarves run through there and the whole setting would be complete, now wouldn't it?

However, I had attended my 'Princely Duties' enough to know not to let any of my disdain show upon my face. Then again, I rarely showed any emotion.

"Mae Govanna," I spoke quietly, as a dark haired ellon greeted me with a hand on my shoulder.

"Welcome to Imladris, Greenwood Prince. You honor us with your presence." He said, a small smile upon his face as he looked me over. I decided to do the same, letting my eyes graze his body. Hmm, he was slim like most elves, not broad built like humans but lithe. Dark hair, brown eyes, and slightly darkened skin. Not bad. I gave him a greeting smile.

He smiled back happily. Well, maybe these Noldor weren't so bad.

"We will have a party lead you back to the kingdom".


	2. I Stay Away

Heaven Beside You

A Lord of the Ring fanfiction

By: Butterfly Wolf

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Everything is owned by J. R. R. Tolkein and his family, and or New Line Cinema.

Authors Note: Thank you for the review, I wouldn't have even put this up if it wasn't for that review. This chapter I think is a lot better than the last, explains the point of the story I suppose. Please review and forgive me for taking so long to update even with your review!

xX~I Stay Away~Xx

When I traveled to Imladris, I was a quite elf. Not one for showing much emotion and not one for talking much. I had never been close to any of my kin, not since my Nana's passing, and I suppose it had never quite left me. The carefree person that came about me in my later days was all by Estel's doing. Thus why it faded eventually, and it seemed that I was the same as I was at the beginning of all things that I was at the end of all things.

As I said, originally, I wasn't very fond of the Peredhil. Elrond, a most gracious host and from what I herd very mentionable healer, was well. I knew him and my King did not get on well, but I tried to reserve my judgment of the half-elf, for my sake. Rather I liked these people or not I was stuck here for sometime, so best make light of it.

When I first actually met Estel, he was but a child. I thought he'd always be naught but a child in my eyes, but as usual he proved me wrong.

In the great valley of Rivendell, during my long stay, I had taken to night walks amongst the stars, throughout the wonderful garden and great trees. The trees made me feel more at home than any thing else in Rivendell, although they were much different from the great wood that grew amongst my fathers land, they were trees none the less.

Several elves of Imladris tended to do the same. Not that there was a crowd of us out there every night, but about the many nights I had done this, some nights I encountered one elf, and the next night another different one. Here I met the great Balrog-Slayer, Glorfindel. He was probably my first wakening point, other than Estel. I seem to think my life before Estel was like a dream. My whole world teetered on this and that, it was a constant rambunctious cycle that I had never been fond of, not since Nana passed. Creatures and fright had threatened my fathers land since well before my majority, and since her passing all I did was fight them off for him. It was like a thoughtless dreamscape, my life. A battle I never had an intention of winning. The most alive I ever felt was when I was fighting for my life against the beast of the woods, any other time I was floating on a raincloud. Father's own greif had ever been too near to aid me in my own, and soon, like some great poison, it seeped in, and left me with what I thought was some sickness. Little did I know, that sickness was nothing compared to Estel's fangs of life. I felt like I had lived my life in some great tunnel, and one day that human barged in, broke through the rock, and pulled me into the light. It hurt my eyes, my heart, and my body, leaving them stunned all at once. And just as soon as terrors and frights of the darkness I had seen began to pass and I became sure of myself once more, he threw me back into the tunnel and barricaded the door.

Glorfindel had been a searching miner with a lantern. He had seen me, asked if I wished for light, and told me to find my own way. It was here, in those gardens, that I first met him.

It was a cold night I suppose. I never much felt the cold, as most elves don't. But more than that, I had no interest in feeling the cold. Outter sensations held no meaning to me.

"You look like you wish to shiver, Greenwood Prince." Spoke a voice.

I had turned quickly, more than a little disappointed in myself for not feeling his presence beforehand.

He looked a little different than I imagined. I had always thought that elves were all slight and skinny, not with the strong build of men, of course, other than the Peredhil. But he proved me wrong. He was broad-shouldered and wide, his muscles well defined through his evening tunic. I was a bit impressed I suppose, and raised an eyebrow at his opening statement.

"Wish to shiver?" I questioned, a bit confused. Shivering was on a whim?

He must have read the confusion on my face more than the confusion in my statement, because he chuckled.

"Yes, you wish too. Looks to me like your body fends off the affects the cold has by the wish of your mind. Your great mind takes no notice to the sensations your skin shoots off." He explained, eyeing me. I was suddenly very uncomfortable. While Glorfindel was very well interesting to look at, I had no…intention of indulging in such things as what I believed him to be thinking. I tired not to sneer and backed away from him, letting him know that something he said had unnerved me.

"I have on a rather appropriate tunic, my lord. It fends the cold from my skin quite well, and I am rather fond of its place." I hissed, hoping it got the message along well enough. He laughed again, this time fully amused, and took another step toward me, both actions starting to infuriate me.

"Prince, I have no intention of separating you from your wonderfully green tunic. I am merely searching for companionship and conversation this night, Erestor must work late, for Elrond is now ever busy with Estel." Said the golden-haired slayer rather sorrowfully. And while I took notice of his mention of Erestor, serpent tongue of the council room, I was more interested in his word of Estel, the small human I had herd about.

"It is true than?" I asked, rather bluntly. Avoiding council room duties made me a bit blunt in my quest for things. Although apparently I had been well enough for my King to send me on this great errand, I did not see myself as a skilled councilmen.

Glorfindel raised an eyebrow at my bluntness.

"With verbal skills like that, I'm sure Erestor eats you up." He commented, rather amused looking. It didn't help my still rather irritated mood from earlier. This time, I took a little more interest in his mention of the advisor, and I used it as an opportunity to turn the conversation on him.

"You take an awful lot of interest in Elronds advisor, do you not?" I asked, raising my eyebrows in a subtle hint. However, Glorfindel merely repeated that gesture with another damned amused look on his face.

"Well of course I do, dear prince, he's my beloved." And that took me by surprise. In fact, I nearly stepped backwards.

Such things weren't shunned or unheard of in the Greenwood, being most relationships were all kept behind closed doors, but it still shocked me. Actually, I think it was how reserved I was in general that made it so stunning to me. I wasn't offended or anything, just a little surprised.

"Oh…well then I am sorry for…mistaking your meaning earlier." I amended, hoping I hadn't halted any chance of a decent relationship with the Balrog-Slayer. Lucky for me, he waved it off.

"None taken, Prince." He laughed, moving to sit down on one of the benches I hadn't even noticed before hand. He patted the seat next to him, so I took it.

"Yes, it is true about Estel. Son of Arathorn, he is." Muttered Glorfindel, once again his tone rather full of sorrow. I was stunned by this. And how easily he admitted the great hidden heritage to such a stranger as I, an outland stranger at that. But he didn't seem all that bothered by it. In fact, he turned to me then, a very serious look upon his face.

"And may you keep that in mind, Great Prince." He said, his eyes locked with mine.

"For it will bring you great sorrow in years to come. Always remember, even when he doesn't, what the world holds for royal blood, and the pain it contains." And he was gone.

That night I dreamed. I dreamed about the great hidden evil of the world, the small golden band fit for a finger. But in this dream, the ring was not on Sauron's finger, it was not shaped so wide to fit Evil itself, but small, as though for a child. A great man stood next to the small being, small being that I saw hold the great evil. The man wore a crown, but was dressed in a hunters garb. He spoke to me, from a great round room full of noble and well dressed people, from many countries and folk. I noticed then that the room was the Council chamber of Imladris, and the people varied from dwarves to elves. The man spoke elvish, elvish war talk, and seemed to be giving me various commands. Although in my dream my heart fluttered, and I seemed more alive than I had ever seen myself from just looking at this man, in my awakened state I was insulted. Insulted that I would ever be commanded by a man.

When I woke up, it was with a rare unquenched desire that had not bothered me since my majority.

The next day I dreaded the walk in the garden, and nearly thought about skipping it. For I had no interest in speaking to Glorfindel again. So, instead, I took to wondering the halls. Of course, when I had first arrived in Imladris, Melpomean, Erestor's little helper, had given me a tour and told me the man areas of the facility, I hadn't paid him much mind. I knew only my main route that I took on a daily basis and knew only a background view on the rest of the palace. It was night, and only guards and servants seemed to be wondering like I was. Down corridor and corridor I wondered, as I always had. One of my hobbies in my land was wondering. Wondering amongst the trees and the green, always taking my hunting gear of course. Dangers lurked I knew, but it did not stop me. But I felt better having no purpose, no destination, wondering my land, destroying evil in my wake, than facing the sorrow of my home, or the uncertain look of my father. I saw him no more as father, but as a King, for he knew more about being King than he did fatherhood.

So ever wondering be a hobby of mine. Not knowing the way or the destination did not bother me, I was just enjoying the movement. However, It was here that I herd their voices, outside a room down one of the man hallways.

"So you spoke to the Prince?" Elrond's voice, I recognized.

"Yes." Said Glorfindel, the same amount of sorrow evident. For such an amused and happy elf, he spoke in woe tones often.

"What did he say?"  
"Nothing. I told you, Legolas is not to be reached by but one."

"Damn it, Glorfindel, you know we cant have that!" Have what, I wondered. And what in the world did it have to do with me and being 'reached'? Were they discussing my personality? How rude! Suddenly, I was rather offended by the whole thing, and nearly opened the door. But was interrupted.

"Ahem."

Another voice I recognized.

Deciding to hold onto my dignity, I turned quickly, as if showing no guilt in my actions.

Erestor stood behind me, looking also rather offended.

"Any excuse for eavesdropping outside my room, Mirkwood Prince?" he asked, sneering.

I sneered back, rather annoyed at his superior tone.

"Yes. I herd my name spoken. It is rude to discuss others outside their company." I said, straightening my back to come to my full height. Erestor was not impressed. In fact, he merely rose an eyebrow at me and my antics.

"Ah, I see. Imagine how little in the world would be done if all we discussed were present, no?" He mocked, making me even angrier.

"If ever Sauaron were in the room when we spoke of him, the world could be a rather dark place, couldn't it?" My fury was barely containable, so I decided I best keep my mouth shut against the serpent tongued advisor. But, after that, he merely raised an eyebrow at me.

"Enjoy your evening, Prince. May Lorien Bless your Dreams." He spoke, taking me off guard as he brushed passed me and into his rooms.

Lorien? Did he know of my dream?

Afterwards, figuring I knew all the fends of Imladris were under one corridor, I decided to head on out to the garden. Erestor, Glorfindel, and Elrond were all in Erestor's room, doing what, I refused to think about. Last night's unquenched desire was still too surfaced, and I had no intention of reawakening it with uncomely images.

Instead, I took to a tree, a tree I had been admiring for sometime and decided to rest on its lower branch, dazing in and out of reality, letting the calmness of the trees sooth my irritation.

It wasn't long after I had passed into the world of dreams that I was reawakened.

"Estel!" yelled a voice in the distance, and I herd the ever-approaching sound of small feet against the soft ground. Blinking, I returned to the world around me.

"Pretty elf, pretty elf!" yelled a child's voice, too rough to be that of an elfling. Suddenly, I was wide awake, and watching with wonder as the small human child dressed in elf garbs ran across the ground beneath me.  
"Pretty elf!" He yelled, running up and pointing at me. My eyes widened, registering completely who this was running about so carelessly. It was sort of refreshing, in its own way, and I couldn't help but smile at him indulgently, reaching my larger hand down to his small hand that reached for me now.

"Pretty elf, pretty pretty elf, smile!" He yelled, looking up at me.

I should never have grabbed his hand.


End file.
